Tried to go to the ol' campus bar
It's the worst bar, yar, worst bar by far
Dudes with drinks hogging up the line
Your too tall
Your too fine
I used that spelling purpose, too seem
Like I was younger, a real teen scream
Songs as old as your blankie get a pop
It's a gosh darn meat market douchestorm bop
Spotlights and guards
Is this a bar or a prison
That... Actually, wow
It's kind of terrifying
It's really scary
I'm not even being poetic
And it's not like the blade rave
That wasn't able to take it far enough
Because, for some reason, the vampires only brought one douchey human
Cheryl, it's your job to bring the human this fortnight
It's a real blood orgy
No really
I'm watching a blood orgy
And it's exactly what you think it is
Why won't I look away
Why don't I make that choice
Why can't I
What happens to the bodies
Oh christ
What do they do with them
Is this why i don't recognize any of the faces
Is this why I never did
Are they all dead now
Why do they writhe
WHY DO THEY WRITHE
But maybe that's why I never got laid in college
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